Alan Cross

What I Did Over Christmas

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

What I Did Over Christmas

Every year we go into Christmas with all kinds of hopes and expectations for the holidays. 

Truth is, though, that after the turkey's been eaten and Grandma's Christmas money has been frittered on Boxing Day sales is that there's really isn't much to do until everyone gets back to work.  That is, if you didn't have to work during the holidays

My wife, for example, had to work the awkward week (Dec 29-31, off Jan 1, back on Jan 2) required by scores of employers.  I could have gone into the office in solidarity with my wife's employment requirements, but given that I have everything I need to do this job at home, I chose to take the easy way out. 
 
However, The Wife insisted in assigning me chores around the house. 

For the record, the basement has been cleaned, my CDs and records have been filed, my closet has been cleaned out of those clothes I don't wear anymore, the dog got to the dog park, the turdcicles in the back yard have been picked up and the driveway and the sidewalk are spotless. 

I did, however, manage to short out the stove while trying to change the light in the oven (don't ask) and I forgot to clean the ceiling fans--a sin for which I will be sorely punished once she realizes it.
 
Another thing on my list was to clean out my inbox.  I get hundreds and hundreds of emails a day through multiple accounts and for most the year, a big number sits next to various folders, mocking me.  If my whole existence was based on answering emails, I'd be fine.  But there's more to life than email, Twitter, Facebook and MySpace.
 
The amazing thing was that I DID manage to respond to just about every email I needed to.  The rest was handled by Nathalia, one of the people at ExploreMusic and Ongoing History.  (God bless her soul!)  But as I dug myself out from under this binary mountain, I noticed something odd:  I've started getting spam from myself.
 
Since I work for Corus Entertainment, I have an official company address to go along with various other email alias.  Sometime after Christmas, I began getting notices from my own corporate email about various male enhancement remedies, all written at varying levels of frankness and vulgarity. 

Obviously, some bot spidered my corporate email and is now using it as some kind zombie address to spam people with subject lines like "Don't Let Size Stop You" and "Penetrate Her Deeply." 
 
Imagine my horror.  If you've received any emails from alan.cross @corusent.com offering any of these promises, remedies or techniques, my apologies.  I have nothing to do with any of them. 

Meanwhile, if you know of any way to expunge a personal address from a spammer list, please let me know.  I wish to do someone much harm.


Krist Novoselic Brains Himself



One of the most infamous moments of Nirvana’s existence was when Krist Novoselic brained himself with his bass during the 1992 MTV Music Video Awards. 

When Krist went on stage that night, things were not good.  He had just had a run-in with a couple of members of Guns N’Roses and was a little rattled. 

Nirvana had been fighting with the producers about what song they were going to play and it ended badly. 

And when Nirvana started playing, Krist’s bass sounded awful and he couldn’t hear himself. That’s why at the end of “Lithium,” he threw his bass up into the air. 

He had done it many times before, but this time, no. Twenty-five feet up, twenty-five feet down–right on his head.  He faked being knocked out, but he wasn’t. He was just stunned and embarrassed. 

Paramedics took care of him with some bandages and champagne.


Naming Your Album

Finding a title for your album can be a tricky thing.  It has to balance your image with your sound with that need to stand out in a crowd. 

The Sex Pistols chose Never Mind the Bollocks because they wanted to be deliberately provocative. 

Same thing with the Revolting Cocks–an industry band from the 90s–who released a record called Steers Beers and Queers. 

Another option is to go with something that doesn’t make a lot of sense at first glance. 

What the heck was U2 thinking when they came up with All That You Can’t Leave Behind or How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb? 

Or you could just go with the self-title approach. Weezer tried it three times, but each they did it, the public rebelled. We now call those records the Blue album, the Green album and the Red album.  Duh. 

The Beatles could have told you what was gonna happen. After all, official name of The White Album is just The Beatles.



If you have any comments or suggestions about anything to do with ExploreMusic (on-air or online), please feel free to send them to me at alan@exploremusic.com


Alan Cross is the host of the radio edition of ExploreMusic as well as The Ongoing History of New Music.  He’s also the senior program director at Splice Interactive and the Chief Curator of Exploremusic.


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